Do you know your MAT(s)
Thursday, February 25, 2010
  Mat Punkrock
From:_____________________________
Sent: 24 February 2010 16: 32PM
To: knowyourmats@hotmail.com

I've only let a few guys into my life and this particular ex will always be remembered.
Not because he was nice or sweet but because he was the biggest asshole to have entered my life.

I was 18 then, when I entered ITE. I had a boyfriend, my very first but it didn't worked out.
He was my first boyfriend and I was too clingy perhaps for his taste.
Being my first love, I found it very hard to get over him.
But this story isn't about the first ex.
I met this guy, R, when I was in ITE.
R was good-looking and seemed like my type.
He one of those guys you would find in punkrock gigs.
We clicked right from the start having had almost the same interests in music and all.
He was my bestfriend and we went everywhere together.
My ex and I, we were still having this on and off relationship.
He says he stills wants me but he'd rather spend all his time with his friends.
I was very affected by this because I loved him and wanted us to last.
R was always there for me.
Our partners knew that we were bestfriends.
I had nothing to hide.
But not long after, my ex went MIA on me and I was devastated.

R was always there.
He comforted me.
We had a band and I enjoyed jamming with him and the rest of my bandmates every week.
Our band was like a big family and although I was the only girl, I felt I fit right in because they treated me like one of the guys.
During that period, I was still crying every night trying to get hold of the ex and basically being heart-broken.
It went on like that for around 6 months.
After I heard from one of my acquantaince that my ex had already moved on, I finally gave up trying to get back with my ex.
He went MIA without even breaking up with me and I finally accepted it.
So this R, we talked on the phone every night.
He offered his shoulders for me to cry on and I did.
And being bestfriends, it was only natural that I confide in him.

But one particular night, we were talking on the phone as usual,
and he asked me if I would give him a chance to take care of me.
I told him that I didn't want to jeopardize our friendship so let's just be friends.
R was being persistent, even going to the extend of wanting to end our friendship if I didn't give him a chance.
So I did.
We were officially together and our friends were not surprised.
Apparently, they think we were meant for each other.
So we graduated and he was called for National Service.
That's when my nightmare began.
When he went to NS, I started working.
So I would top up his hp and get his neccesities when he comes homes every weekend.
I would always call him at night when he's in camp but he was always busy and say he's prepaid is low.
So one weekend, I checked his hp and there was a girl's name.
I confronted him and he finally confessed.
Unbelievable.
He was barely a month in NS and he's the one getting girls eventhough he was the one in camp.
I forgave him and things starts going downhill from there.

After he P.O.P, he got a posting that only requires him to work from 8am to 5pm.
And the occasional guard duty.
Most of the time he would always pester me to stay over at his house after work.
He was living alone.
His parents are living in JB and his siblings were rarely home when I was around.
I had to cook for him, wash his clothes, iron his uniforms, clean his rooms and do everything.
And on top of all that, I had to financially support him because according to him, his pay is too little.
So I would get groceries for his house, top up his hp and ezlink every month.
And mostly when we go out, I would pay.
I felt like a maid and I complained to him that I'm tired too because I'm working and I can't carry on doing things for him.
We would fight all the time.
He would say that I'm not fit to be his wife if I refuse to cook or clean for him.
He would call me a sundal if I didn't give him money or do his bidding.
And the worst, he keeps accusing me of cheating on him eventhough I was staying at his house.
Little did I know, he keeps accusing me because he was the one cheating behind my back.

I called countless girls and he told them all the same stuff.
That he was single and I dumped him.
He even told one of the girl that I was a drug addict and alcoholic.
I found out from some of the girls that he even brought them home and slept with them when I didnt stay over.
Despite all that I still forgave him each time and continue giving him money and doing his house chores.
Sometimes, he would leave me at his house to clean, wash and cook while he went out with his friends.
Even when he beat me up during our fights, I always ended up going back to him.
I keep giving him chances after chances.
And I held on for as long as I could, 3 and a half years.
I found out so many things about him.
He lied a lot. He told me he had guard duty but he went clubbing.
He would ask me for money to pay fines but he went drinking instead.
He told me he had to go work and had no money to top up his ezlink but he went to meet some girl at Bedok.
And I actually paid for all these.
He would always ask me for money or simply keep my ATM card.
All my money were spend mostly for his expenses.
He was a fantatic liar and a master in deception.
I would always pity him for living alone and having no parents to care for him at home.
And he would always take advantage of that.
My sister and friends by then, already knew of R's attitude towards me.
My sis especially hate him because of all the bruises he gave me when I came home.
I think even my dad knew.
They would ask me to leave R but I held on.
I was really miserable, but I loved him too much.

I keep praying to God to let me see him with a girl just once so I can let him go.
And finally my prayers were answered.
One day, I just came back from an interview.
I got the job and I was really excited to tell R.
So I went over to his house to give him a surprise.
I knocked on the door but no one answered.
I called his hp but he didn't answer.
I was getting to leave when his sister open the door.
I asked her politely if R is home.
She told me that he was at home and asked me to knock on his room.
And when I did, I saw 3 girls in what looks like clothes you would wear to sleep and 3 guys(including R).
R was topless.
My limbs were shaking so bad.
I wanted to shout but all I could muster was a whisper.
I was texting one of the girls who was in the room when I was on the way to R's house.
R had some affair with her and I found out.
So I told her to please respect me and not contact him again.
She promised me not to meet R again but she was in that room with him all the time I was texting her!
Apparently they had been staying there for 2 days according to R!
I was so angry and upset.
And I finally just say sorry for crashing their party and left.
I called my dad and he picked me up.
I sobbed all the way home.
I still forgave him after a week or so.
And guess what?
I found out that he was still contacting the same girl!
I simply just left after that and never came back.
I was still hurt and he still went out with her despite knowing that I had already caught them together.
He came over to my house crying a few times but I didn't even go out to see him.
I changed my number, email, everything.
We even shifted house not long after the break-up.

I'm thankful that I caught R red-handed.
Our 3 and half years means nothing.
I never wanted anything to do with him again.
I think that ugly vision of them in the room together is what keeps me strong enough to leave him.

I'm a happier girl now.
Just thought I'd share my typical mat story.
=o)
 
Comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]





<< Home

Archives
September 2009 / October 2009 / November 2009 / December 2009 / January 2010 / February 2010 / March 2010 / April 2010 / May 2010 / June 2010 / July 2010 / August 2010 /


Powered by Blogger

Subscribe to
Posts [Atom]